‘The First Lady Bishop Abioye Asked for Marriage, Refused Him Because of Money’
-Pastor David Oyedepo jnr
VISION IN RELATIONSHIPS
Proverbs 29:18, the Bible says when there is no vision, the people perish. Vision is vital for any individual that will have a profitable and a glorious home, before you start going after the person, go after the Vision. Hello, what are you here for? Jeremiah 29:11 says I know the thoughts I have towards you, thoughts of good and not of evil to give you an expected end. There is a need to locate vision because one of the things you need to identify is clarity of vision.
If you ask my wife, everything I am doing now in terms of my assignment, I have explained it all to her. There is no surprise, I say this is how it is going to be, these are the things that are required of me. People wonder, how is she able to handle such a man, the description was too clear, I will sit down and describe it: I say you see, as a Pastor, this is what is required of me, I will be here and there in one meeting or the other. We now have to sit down, based on the vision for her to be able to see whether her vision can cohabit with mine.
People just marry anyhow, he will say you see, “the way I look at her, we are very compatible”, you don’t marry anyhow.
What do you like about her? “She is quiet, she is melancholy and I am sanguine, we just merge, our personalities just work out”.
It is not only personality; the question is where are you going? If you are supposed to arrive in New York and you enter South African flight, you are already in trouble.
Where are you going? Check the vision, there must be vision.
Our single women, if you want to marry a man that does not know where he is going, it is a dangerous thing. It is like entering a bus that has no destination. You must understand that there must be direction. God will help our understanding in Jesus name.
There is a need for vision. God told Abraham in Genesis 13:14 as far as you can see, I will give it to you, so it is what you see that determines what you accomplish.
Check the man first, does he have vision? People are checking his pocket if he has money, money will expire without vision. Some people are running all around town following people who have money or connections. They say “I marry this person, do you know who his uncle is?” - just following after the wrong things.
The real question is does he have vision?
There are many great men that the first people they spoke to refused them because of money. In case you would like to know, the first person Bishop David Abioye spoke to said ‘No’ because at that time he had nothing, is he not loaded now?
Vision determines provision; provision will be flowing in the direction of vision. Look into the vision, I am not talking about balloon dreams like “you see I will be a millionaire. I promise you”. If you are not careful, you will marry a criminal. Check whether he has a vision, valid vision.
What will he be offering the world? That is the real question. So many people might be saying “God knows, he has told me I will be a billionaire”, doing what? They don’t become a billionaire doing nothing.
The real question is, what is the vision for his life? How does he want to impact his world? That is the question we should be asking each other.
As individuals, we have to locate visions for ourselves. When me and my wife were in courtship, we had to sit down and plan what is it that you want to do, what is it that God wants you to do, we wrote it down and compared it. If you have not located vision, by the time you are located, you will look like a misfit. God will help our understanding in the name of Jesus.
Have vision, locate the vision for your life and locate vision for your family. Have a picture of what your family should be like and how it should function. Take scriptures and paint pictures with it. My wife did not understand when I was explaining to her that there will be no argument, she didn’t understand it but I had taken scriptures and began to paint the picture for her. We had four solid years of courtship but in that four solid years no argument, is it now in the marriage that we will start arguing? Paint pictures from scriptures so that you can see where you are going.
Take time to pray that God should show you things as it concerns your future, both individually and concerning your family. Take time to pray concerning your vision, take action, take steps. Many people are associated with people who are big dreamers but don’t take any step. I don’t respect your dreams until I see your action. What action are you taking to bring your vision to pass?
I had a friend who was always saying, "in five years, imagine what we will be" and then the next year, he says "in five years, imagine what we will be". I was always going along with him because he had a very good description of where he was going. One of the first biographies of businessmen I read, he introduced that biography to me. We were in a way like-minded but it was so much of dreaming and zero action no step, even in marriage before he got married, he was in courtship before I and my wife started. He had original courtship from the start, (but) for him to get married and everything, zero action.
Watch yourself, do you take steps on the dream that you have, watch the person you are entering into a relationship with, does he take steps on the dream that he has? God will help our understanding in Jesus name.