Do not come on Social Media to learn marriage. Real marriages don't exist
on social media and no two marriages are the same.


You will be so misled with the picture profiles of husbands and wives and
the wonderful lectures offered free of charge from experienced and
ill-experienced writers on social media.


If you are an Igbo lady and you get home and practice these free online
lectures, one day you will see yourself thrown out of your marriage and no
one will receive you to his or her home and you can't return back to your
Parents house in the village - of course the home now belongs to your
brother's wife. It's a different issue for a Yoruba girl. She probably has
a room inherited from her Parents and it remains hers.


If you are a man and you rely on these online free lecturers for your
marriage, one day you will see yourself killing a human being because you
couldn't stand the nonsense that people told you they wouldn't stand.


Husband, get up and go look for the family upkeep and return back and show
your wife and family love. Marriage has sex in it, but frankly, it's less
to do with sex - unless you want to go poor and in it, you risk that same
woman disrespecting you and respecting well to do dudes instead.


Love is not the sex , but the sacrifices and denials you have to go through
that they might live. Sometimes they acknowledge, sometimes they don't, but
you have no better option than to get out there and hustle to provide for
them.


If you are a woman, go home and submit to the authority of your husband.
Nobody goes to pay a dowry on a woman she hates. Anything your husband
tells you in the course of his retraining you to fit into your new life is
not intended to harm , but to build you and build his home for the future.


Your Pastor does not love you more than your Husband. In fact, you won't
wish to be a Pastor's wife if you know how difficult that ministry is. It's
not easy to be a Pastor's wife at all. It takes the grace.


Your friends wish they had married your husband instead, but they will be
giving you advice without ever telling you that you are lucky to have your
man. They will always support you until you become homeless.


Your Priest may advice you based on his own understanding of Bible and
stories he has heard in the course of counseling, but he has never married
a woman before. Take orders from the man who came to take you from your
Parents home and not from a Pastor or prayer partner. He means well for you.


At any point you no longer wish to submit to your husband's authority, you
are good to go. No man who is indeed the provider of his home , no matter
how little he is, could take the slant of double sources of authority in
his marriage.


Go and marry your Pastor or your Parents. Go before your kill him or he
kills you. Marriage is not compulsory. It is not a criteria for making
heaven.


If you intend to Practice America and English marriage, don't start it with
dowry and family consultation things. Both of you are adults. Go into any
Court Registry and marry.


That's how they do it abroad. When they break up, it's not an issue. They
are adults. Don't expect an English based culture in your marriage ; when
you did an Igbo traditional marriage.


You heard up and down that men don't beat woman and that's your notion of
marriage?  Rubbish, siblings which suckled same Breasts do fight, how much
you coming together from homes and villages apart!


Your Mum and friends are asking you to get out from marriage because you
quarreled with your husband? Get the hell outta here! Human beings are
beaten and you are a human being not a goddess. You settle your stuff
within you. Your mum is in her own husband's house.


You didn't start fighting at your honeymoon, did you?  Something happened.
Sit down and find it and sort it out so there won't be a repeat. The Bible
would say " in the beginning, it was not so..."    Yes, in the beginning,
you weren't fighting.


You've been years together in marriage without a fight.  Look for where
the hole is and patch it to avoid a further leak. It's un-patched leakages
that lead to abusive marriages.


I am mad. I know it, since.
Bye.


Aptly written by Iyiachukwu G C Achukwu...